Things my son, Skeletor, did within the space of three hours. (Can you say rapidly ballooning aneurysm? Good! I knew you could!)
- Pulled every book (and we have quite a few) off of the bookshelf. He then flipped said bookshelf over, and proceeded to jump up and down on the back of it. He reminded me of Donkey Kong.
- Poured an entire cup of juice on his bed. Not an accident.
- Used the dish sprayer thingy in the sink to give the kitchen a bath. Toaster included.
- Made "potions" in my set of olden-timey, glass medicine bottles The "potion" included tooth paste. Clearly it needed to be poured everywhere.
- Broke another leg off of the end table in the living room. It was already propped against the wall on just three legs. It is now beyond propping.
- Made another "potion" in the bathroom sink. This "potion" was made by running water over a bunch of markers to make pretty colors. I'm sure you can imagine what happened.
- Poured another cup of juice onto the kitchen table. He then stripped completely naked, and rolled around in the puddle.
- Fell from his perch on the back of a recliner. Now has a hellacious shiner.
- Broke his learner guitar over his sister's leg. In his defense, he seemed to be channeling the spirit of Kurt Cobain, and she was merely a casualty of the mojo. It's a good lesson to learn early, really. Never get in the way of rock. You might bleed.
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| Skeletors can't fly. |
I have nothing else to say. I'm pretty sure this list speaks for itself. I forget, why don't I binge drink?
