Thursday, June 28, 2012

Shiva, The Destroyer Of Worlds

     Things my son, Skeletor, did within the space of three hours.  (Can you say rapidly ballooning aneurysm?  Good!  I knew you could!)


  1. Pulled every book (and we have quite a few) off of the bookshelf.  He then flipped said bookshelf over, and proceeded to jump up and down on the back of it.  He reminded me of Donkey Kong.
  2. Poured an entire cup of juice on his bed.  Not an accident.
  3. Used the dish sprayer thingy in the sink to give the kitchen a bath.  Toaster included.
  4. Made "potions" in my set of olden-timey, glass medicine bottles  The "potion" included tooth paste.  Clearly it needed to be poured everywhere.
  5. Broke another leg off of the end table in the living room.  It was already propped against the wall on just three legs.  It is now beyond propping. 
  6. Made another "potion" in the bathroom sink.  This "potion" was made by running water over a bunch of markers to make pretty colors.  I'm sure you can imagine what happened.
  7. Poured another cup of juice onto the kitchen table.  He then stripped completely naked, and rolled around in the puddle.
  8. Fell from his perch on the back of a recliner.  Now has a hellacious shiner.
  9. Broke his learner guitar over his sister's leg.  In his defense, he seemed to be channeling the spirit of Kurt Cobain, and she was merely a casualty of the mojo.  It's a good lesson to learn early, really.  Never get in the way of rock.  You might bleed.
Skeletors can't fly.
      I have nothing else to say.  I'm pretty sure this list speaks for itself.  I forget, why don't I binge drink?

22 comments:

  1. So, um, how is Summer break going for you then?

    ReplyDelete
  2. I will stop complaining about the marks Ball added to my kitchen table tonight. You win!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Wow! You must get so bored!;D

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh, yes, it's just mind-numbingly boring around here!

      Delete
  4. By god woman, that sounds like our summer break!!!! And we don't binge drink because that would be wrong. Just wrong.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I didn't start binge drinking until my son graduated from high school. I saved up! Looks like you may not be able to wait that long! Kid's are such a joy!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I definitely have lots of points saved up!

      Delete
  6. Replies
    1. That's not me. That's Shiva. ;)

      Delete
    2. Well, you may have fewer arms, but ... on a day like that, you need to hear about how pretty you are. Am i right?

      Delete
  7. lol, the special needs drinking game- take a shot every time something gets destroyed! And we're all drunk by lunchtime. :O

    Both my kids keep falling off the arm of the couch, I assume trying to be superheroes or something. But my son keeps falling ass first so his butt & legs are totally polka dotted with bruises. ?!?! Oy vey.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ohmygah, I'm making that game! I will give you credit! You're a genius!

      Delete
  8. I JUST LOVE HIM he makes me smile!! And I wish I had his energy :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I know! It's intense, to say the least. But he sure keeps my life interesting!

      Delete
  9. Once my son got into my mega pack of tampons, dumped them into the sink and turned the faucet on.
    Yea...
    He discovered that tampons are the most awesomest thing on this planet.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh, God, now I have to hide all my tampons! They might as well be a ticking time bomb!

      Delete
  10. Wow. That is one busy kid!

    Little Miss would like for him to come over for a play date. She just figured out the joy of dumping all her books over the balcony in our foyer. It should be fun.

    ReplyDelete