Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Welcome To Fight Club

     I will now proceed to break the first rule of Fight Club.  And the second one.  This afternoon as we pulled into our driveway, Skeletor and Sassafrass unbuckled themselves and jumped into the "trunk" of our minivan.  I put that in quotations because I don't know if the area behind the third row seat of a minivan counts as a trunk.  But, I digress.  Anyway, they leaped with abandon into the trunk-like area in the back of our van.  And before my eyes, they transformed from sweet children happily at play into bare-knuckle bruisers not unlike a certain gypsy character from another Brad Pitt movie.  They were SCRAPPIN', ya'll!  Names were called, skin was scratched, someone asked me to hold their earrings, and one of them might have pulled out a razor.  It was insanity!  Then, sweet Sassafrass straight up cold-cocked her brother.  Punched him dead in the eye.  I'm not going to lie; it was slightly impressive coming from a six year old.  And then they both ran off crying in opposite directions, and it was over.  Total time spent in the ring?  Less than five seconds.  Bookies all over West Tennessee are cursing our names tonight.

Dramatic recreation.

7 comments:

  1. Kids. If they were bigger they'd be criminals.

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  2. We don't talk about what happens in the "trunk" of our minivan.

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  3. @Nicole: They're going to be confined one way or another if they keep up their shenanigans. @Just Keep Swimming: Crap, I probably wasn't supposed to either. I've already said too much!

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  4. Did they make soap? If they didn't make soap then I'd count that as a win. Yeah, I aim THAT low.

    You do know they may gang up on you now that you broke the rule. Now you have to post in a few days so we know you're still alive. And not soap. :)

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  5. If they weren't terrified that they might accidentally get some of the soap on them, I probably would have been a mommy-scented bar a long time ago!

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  6. Okay I was smiling throughout this post, but that picture caption at the end did it and won me my neighbourhood's Best Hyena Impersonator Award. (At like 5am. Hoo boy there'll be nasty looks from the neighbours in the morning.)

    Great blog and writing style - I'll be back!

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